When School Learning Depends on Help at Home

By Sylvia Langford · 6 min read

When helping becomes a necessity

Over the course of my work with children, families and schools, I began questioning something that initially seemed like a straightforward part of children's education: the assistance parents provide with schoolwork.

Parents naturally want their children to succeed. They encourage them, explain what they don't understand, help them organise their work and celebrate their achievements.

This involvement can be valuable.

But I began noticing two difficulties that seemed closely connected.

Sometimes children were expected to complete schoolwork they couldn't yet manage independently, leaving parents responsible for helping them succeed.

At the same time, the assistance children received could make it difficult to distinguish what they had genuinely learned from what they could only accomplish with an adult's help.

These observations raised a question that has stayed with me:

Are we always helping children develop their capabilities, or are we sometimes helping them complete work without developing the independence needed to do it themselves?

Academic performance is not necessarily independent capability

A child may submit completed homework, receive good marks and appear to be progressing well.

But what happens when the same child is asked to complete a comparable activity on their own?

Can the child understand the instructions, organise the work, apply what has been learned and recognise whether the answer is correct?

These questions matter because academic performance, acquired capability and independent capability are not necessarily the same thing.

During the parent–child workshops I conducted as a psychologist, I observed that some parents intervened almost immediately when their children experienced difficulty.

They explained repeatedly, supplied answers or occasionally completed activities for them.

Their intention was to help.

Yet I began recognising that completing a task for a child could remove the very opportunity the child needed to develop a new ability.

Appropriate guidance is important. Children sometimes need demonstrations, explanations, encouragement or additional support.

But the goal should be to help children gradually accomplish more on their own, not to make them permanently dependent on that guidance.

When educational responsibility shifts towards families

A second concern emerged from my experiences with schools.

What happens when children haven't developed the foundational abilities needed to complete the academic work expected of them?

Teachers face real challenges. They must follow the curriculum, respond to different abilities and organise learning for an entire classroom.

Sometimes children need additional practice or support beyond regular lessons.

But I began questioning what happens when parents are increasingly expected to explain, reteach or supervise academic content their children have not yet understood at school.

Families may then feel responsible not only for supporting their children's education, but also for making sure they achieve the academic results expected by the school.

I don't believe schools and families should work independently of one another. Their collaboration is essential.

But collaboration should not mean transferring responsibility for academic teaching from schools to parents.

Schools should remain principally responsible for teaching the curriculum and creating opportunities for children to develop the capabilities needed to learn it.

Families have an important, complementary role.

When the two problems reinforce one another

These concerns become particularly significant when they occur together.

A child who struggles with an activity may receive substantial help at home. With that assistance, the work is completed and the child may obtain satisfactory results.

Yet those results don't necessarily show that the underlying capability has been acquired.

If the child continues to need similar assistance, the cycle may repeat.

The family provides more support, while the child's independent abilities remain difficult to assess.

This can also make it harder for teachers to recognise where additional educational guidance is needed.

I began wondering whether we should pay greater attention to the conditions in which children demonstrate their learning.

What can they accomplish independently? What can they achieve with guidance? And what needs to change so that something they can currently do only with help becomes a capability they possess themselves?

These are different questions, and each provides valuable information.

An issue of educational opportunity

There is another consequence that concerns me.

Families have different circumstances.

Some parents have time, educational knowledge and financial resources to provide extensive academic assistance. Others work long hours, face language barriers or can't afford additional support.

These differences should not determine children's opportunities to develop foundational academic abilities.

When school success depends heavily on the assistance available at home, inequalities outside school may become reflected in academic performance.

None of this suggests that family involvement is undesirable. What it does mean is that children should have meaningful opportunities to develop their academic capabilities within the school environment, regardless of the additional assistance their families can provide.

What should children and families gain from education?

I believe education should help children become increasingly capable and independent.

Children need opportunities to understand instructions, attempt manageable challenges, practise, make mistakes, recognise their progress and develop confidence in what they can accomplish.

As their independence grows, their relationship with adults can also change.

Parents may spend less time repeatedly correcting, reminding or guiding every step of an activity.

That can free up time for families to be together in other meaningful ways: talking, playing, exploring interests, sharing experiences and building relationships.

These are also important parts of children's development.

Families should not be valued primarily for how effectively they can supplement academic teaching.

A shared responsibility with different roles

I don't believe the answer is to eliminate homework, discourage parental involvement or expect every child to learn without assistance.

Some children require additional teaching, individual adaptations or specialist support. Others benefit from practising skills at home or sharing learning activities with their families.

The important distinction is between supporting the development of a capability and becoming responsible for compensating for its absence.

Teachers, school leaders, specialists and families need to work together, but their contributions are not identical.

Schools should examine whether learning experiences are appropriately organised, whether children understand what they are expected to do and whether they have opportunities to develop and demonstrate their abilities independently.

Families can provide encouragement, routines, relationships and experiences that support children's broader development.

When additional assistance is necessary, the goal should be clear: helping the child move towards greater capability and independence wherever possible.

A question worth asking

Perhaps we need to reconsider what successful learning really means.

Is it enough for children to complete their work and obtain satisfactory results?

Or should we also ask whether they are developing the capabilities to understand, attempt and complete increasingly demanding activities themselves?

I believe we should aim for both academic achievement and genuine independence.

And we should organise education so that achieving these goals does not depend excessively on how much academic help a family can provide.

The purpose of helping children learn should not simply be to help them succeed today. It should be to develop the capabilities that allow them to succeed with increasing independence tomorrow.